I’m a changed woman… please love me again.
…I’m a changed man.
Why do most people who seek a lover’s return present an improved character instead of improved looks? Because even the most well-intentioned lover hates an empty personality.
Every partner starts as a fan of your walk & talk, but soon enough the curtains fall and they see past the actor. They see the real you.
They realise you work different, love different and approach life different from what you let them believe on the stage where you met.
To your defence, I’d say the actor and person are rarely the same, so it’s kinda silly to expect you to remain exactly who they met.
Wouldn’t you want to be a better catch to your partner as the relationship ages? You can. As a matter of fact, you should. Because wether your partner stays or makes the silly decision to leave, weak buildings don’t stand for long.
- An empty character can’t withstand the pressure of a serious relationship.
- And the fall gets worse after a breakup.
How To Strengthen Your Inner Fortress Before You Step Into Your Next Relationship:
1. Challenge Yourself, Try That Thing
Your partner will not come from your family. Which means you’ll have different views, interests, and those will often make you uncomfortable. To avoid the sting, trying new things. Often.
- Go vegan for a week.
- Seek acquaintances from people of different origins.
- Lead every group you find yourself in.
As your experiences increase, so does your ability to love and tolerate. It’s like pouring a cup of salt in a spoon VS pouring it in an ocean. Wouldn’t it be more tolerable in an ocean? Grow your experiences and your heart will grow.
Challenge yourself before your next relationship does.
2. Tame Your Nerves
What gets on your last nerve? Whatever it is, your partner will probably stomp and dance on that nerve better than anyone else. And when you get into that state, do you like your current response to it?
Map it out.
- What’s the usual trigger?
- What’s your usual response?
- What response would you like to have?
- What do those who have that response do that you don’t?
- Do it.
3. Nerd’ Up
Successful people read, wishful thinkers don’t. The secret to great love making, great business results, great faith and everything else under the sun is written out there.
If you don’t increase what you know, you risk hitting a frontier where you’d be of little help to the person you love.
Don’t stop learning.
At the base of every relationship is the principle of giving and receiving. To increase your ability to give and receive, widen your horizons. How? By improving:
- The things you know of you,
- The things you know of the world,
- The way you do things.
You might want to start before your audience shows up.
To lasting relationships,
: : :
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